The Forest of Azure

She was all that is and ever would be but nothing that ever was. The circumstances of her awakening were unknown to her then and remained unknown to those who would wonder later: those whose shivers crept up through their hearts and made their faces smile and their eyes shine with the slanted happiness that a smile brings. The mysteries of the world that men toil over lent their beginnings and all their romances to the opening of her eyes. She knew only that in the few moments of darkness before she gazed upon her world she felt a climax rumble and sway with the tumult of expectation, and when she took her first breath she found that love was on her lips.

She opened her eyes and felt her body respond to the whims of her desires. She felt her heart in her chest as it churned out breath and guided her movements toward the love she had just spoken. She felt her mind working to feel the earth beneath her as it whirled and commanded the tips of her fingers, the soles of her feet. Her eyes, in service to the machinations of her considering mind and the steady rhythm of her aching heart, gazed upon the foundation of an incomplete world around her and it was in this instance the powers within her melted together and all three at once became a living dream. She stood and strode past the shore of her awakening and walked up through the dirt, and as she felt the earth nestle between her toes she smiled and wished for more. And a forest appeared before her, which she had created through the innate yearnings of the trinity of virtue, understanding and passion within her. She touched the trees she had made and she could hear the wind as it played with the gentle fabric of her hair. There was no before and no thought could be given to a possible after. The presence she had within the world she had created engulfed her like the sea. And at that moment, somewhere far away, an ocean filled in a deep chasm and suddenly, with no reason she could think of, she felt she could stand a little taller, breath a little deeper, and her smile last a little longer.

There was a canvass above her which shone a radiant blue which reflected itself in the trees and the rocks and the leaves and she turned and named her home the Forest of Azure.

In this way she lived for a time she could not say. The leaves didn’t change, nor did they fall; the grass never wilted and her radiance never waned. The changes she experienced were the new manifestations of the unification of her heart and her mind, brought to life by her eyes. When the wind rustled the leaves and blew the sand against the trees she felt that it was music being made by the air. And not long after, she woke to the instruments imagined by her love. The birds she named were yellow and orange and blue and red and when they flew together, their instruments soaring in harmony, her eyes granted her soul what she imagined to be a rainbow. And the birds followed its arc across the sea, singing their praises for the woman who gave them life. The animals of the Forest of Azure sprang one by one from the romance she perceived all around her, the living dream she had created with her love and her senses.

She carried on harvesting the seeds of creation through the weepings of her heart and the science of her brain. There was nothing that ailed her save the darkness she experienced when the light of the day diminished. When her sun blinked farewell and the animals of her forest crept silent to the homes they made for each other, there was no memory of the day, no mark of beauty, no shining reminder of her love. And no matter how she tried she could not fathom a beacon or a marker, a twinkle or a fancy that would blanket her world and guide her heart through the night until the dawn.

And on the day of the birth of our history, she found herself walking through her Forest of Azure, blind in the blackness of the dead of night. And she came upon a pool, still like glass and shining faint with the majesty of a new, unknown creation; brought to life by an ache or a groan or a smile or a laugh. The trees around it stood silent and anxious as the light from the pool exposed the contours of the bark and the wisdom of their age. She crept up to the edge of the pool and knelt before her mysterious creation. She held her body in a poise that defined her majesty and she looked down into the deep and saw herself for the first time. Reflected in the innocence of the pool, she gazed upon her form and realized that for the first time she was sad. And it wasn’t an angry sadness and it wasn’t a pitiful one. It was a realization, an acceptance of something long suspected but always suppressed: that she wasn’t perfect. And it was a sadness of regret, for as she gazed and brushed the outlines of her face that wore her smiles so well, she knew she was growing a vanity she hadn’t entertained before. She loved no less, she cared no less. But her mind sprouted the notion of a better tomorrow and a better one after that. It was a knowledge of the future and what it would hold for the children of her imaginings.

She gazed and ran her fingers through her hair and watched each strand as it responded to her touch. And every movement of the muscles in her face suggested a new dream and slowly her sadness faded way to a glow, a glimmer, reflected in the pool, of the future of her world, a future of her Forest of Azure and the things she imagined Men would do and create as she knelt there beside her pool. And she felt a triumph for what she had done and what was still to be done, but not by her. She sat here, in her Forest of Azure, dreaming and figuring and weeping for the success and the passion and the love of Man as they were to be called and all around her and across the sea the earth was dividing and burning and producing scorched waves of mountains and caverns and giant auspices to her Grace and her love as she sat pouring herself out as her body served the climactic wonders of her reckoning heart and mind.

And all around her the world took shape and grew and gusted and beat its way into familiarity. And as her hot tears of understanding raced down her cheeks she felt her eyes begin to fade and she realized the sacrifice she was making. And she leaned in close to the pool and let a small tear, running down the bridge of her nose, drip down and fall into the pool. And the impact it made and the splash it produced sent up a droplet of water, made by the harmony of her own soul. And the water rose up past her and she watched it go with a a smile only she could wear. It continued to rise up past the trees and past the birds and she gazed at it until she could gaze no more. She laid down, crippled by fantasy and spent of her creation as the world around her took shape. She watched as her last labor rose through what she called clouds. And in the last moments of her life, as her eyes began to fade and all around her turned to dark, she watched the water expand and explode and lights fade on in the sky. They twinkled down on her and with a smile she knew they were stars.

In a few years there would be beings like her walking freely on the earth she created. And they would worship a being like her still. A figure of love incarnate that encapsulated all of her yearnings and all of her imaginings and who would finish the work she had started. A being born of the celestial explosion produced by her last tear, a fountainhead of creation and a harborer of wisdom. And she knew that her sacrifice was the facilitator of the new world that would arise out of the love He would create long after she was gone. And in a few years The Forest of Azure would flourish and be called another name. And life and intelligence would sprout from that Garden of Eden and envelop all that would be good. And it would grow and someday be called by scientists the planet Earth. She felt her eyes flutter and close. In a few hours the sun would shine and a new dawn would dance along the horizon. It would grow to become a day long remembered.